Anticipation of what is to come
Life as we know it.
Thanksgiving has come and gone. Now we approach the Christmas holiday. Already feeling the pressures to check every box while longing to just be. To savor the sounds, the smells, the lights. The ornaments that now hang on my tree that once hung on my grandmothers. Trying to keep my children centered around the true meaning of Christmas so they don't get lost in the way of the world and greed that can overtake this time of year. You know the kind that people get trampled over for on Black Friday. The kind that people get shot over a pair of Air Jordans. Ain't doing it. Oh my word, I could get lost in this lady's videos laughing until I wet myself. All kidding aside, you know there are times I long to have the stillness and closeness to the Lord I had while I was undergoing chemo/treatment. I wasn't working at the time. I just had time with me and the Lord. Such a sweet time that I will never forget. I long for that stillness on so many days when my life seems to be spinning out of control.
This year will be so different in our family. Four became Five. We still anxiously wait the official adoption. This year has been full of every emotion possible. Joy. Fear. Exhaustion. Sadness. I can't help but reflect on how Mary must have felt 2000 years ago. The mother of Jesus. She never could have imagined that she was giving birth to the Promised One. The one that God has promised for thousands of years. The very first love story. Imagine how scared she must have been. Yet she surrendered her life. Lord, your will not mine. Those are the hardest words that can ever be spoken. The weight of each word represents something so difficult. Surrender. Trust. Selflessness. Everything that goes against our human nature. Jesus came into this world in a dirty, lowly manger. He died the death of a sinner, yet he never sinned. All for us. We are so undeserving. Yet it is the best gift we could ever possibly receive.
So now we wait in anticipation of what is to come. We are waiting of the return of Jesus one day. There are many days that I pray for him to just come now. Rather than to experience any more suffering on this earth. There is so much. It's almost too much to bear at times. But then He gives us glimpses of heaven on earth. The smile on a child's face. The thankfulness of one you've blessed by a God-given gift. Life of a new baby. Hearing the words "There is no sign of cancer".
One of my favorite songs- I love these lyrics. Great Are You Lord
You give life.
You are love.
You bring light to the darkness.
You give hope.
You restore every heart that is broken.
Great are You Lord.
It's your breath in my lungs
so we pour out our praise, we pour out our praise.
It's your breath in our lungs
so we pour out our praise to you only.
Such a beautiful reminder of who Jesus is and how we thank him for what he's done. We are nothing apart from him.
Just a few updates:
* we are still waiting on the official court date for his adoption. All I can say is we are very ready and pray it's before Christmas. We thought it would be before Thanksgiving but it wasn't... so we trust the Lord's timing.
* He is truly such a joy. I can't imagine him not being in our lives.
* He is still doing very well on the donor breast milk. He is growing and hasn't vomited in over a month! He is even drinking from a cup and eating table foods. Slowly but surely.
* He can now sit alone and rolling from both sides. He will be 11 months on the 12th!
Emma & Will:
* We have finally wrapped up Fall sports and this momma loves watching her kids play, but I am thankful for some down time. Some time to regroup from an exhausting year.
* He promoted to lieutenant back in August. So proud of him and his accomplishments. He is getting used to his new position and liking it.
* I celebrated my two year cancer-free anniversary on Sept 29th. My foundation is still doing well. We have expanded outside the DFW metroplex to the Austin area and will soon be making donations to MD Anderson in Houston. The Lord has done amazing things this year through this effort.
* There's some big things we are considering that would change how we live our lives. Pray the Lord would continue to reveal his plan. Lord Your will not mine.
Continue to pray for the Lord to intervene in our lives. For health and protection over baby Reid. For his adoption paperwork to all quickly fall into place so we can make it official. We know he is our son, but we want the world to know that. We want you all to SEE him.
We love you and thank you for your continued support as we wait in anticipation for so many things.
Jesus, come soon. We wait for you.